No Sleep Til Savannah

I’m a very tired boy. Last night, we shot a full test episode of my new show Have I Got News For You, which will begin airing on CNN on September 14^th. It was a very fun time. My co-stars Roy Wood Jr. and Amber Ruffin were in top form. As were our two guests, Sam Seder and Negin Farsad. I cannot judge my own performance, of course, but I do recall spending too much time discussing JD Vance’s jizz cup.

If you haven’t seen the object to which I am referring, here it is.

To the best of my knowledge, none of these cups contain actual JD Vance jizz. Probably for the best.

I imagine starting on a new television show is probably like starting any other new job. There’s people to meet, procedures to learn, and lots of free clothes. (Most jobs provide expensive wardrobe, right?) Everybody’s a bit on edge but trying their best to put on a brave face and make a good product. Thankfully, I already knew several of the people involved, so that’s at least a couple fewer people whose names I will forget by the next time I see them.

After the taping, I returned to my hotel for a few hours of not sleeping until I got into a car at 4:30am to head to the airport for a flight to Atlanta, where I am writing these words. I’m here for one day to shoot a small part on a television program, and then home to Savannah. I’m quite tired but in a good way.

Show business is a peculiar and often disheartening endeavor. Most of the actual business of show business is simply trying to get a job. For a performer, getting the job is always much more difficult than doing it. There are so many actors and, apparently, they keep making more. Same with comedians. Same with writers. Same with everything, except for Japanese people. For some reason, they’re making fewer of those.  

It’s fun to work on TV. I like being on set. I like hanging out with other performers. I like making money. I won’t be getting rich from my CNN show, but I am no longer in the same sort of financial peril I have been in since covid hit. I also like being able to answer the question, “So, what are you doing next?” without having to say either, “Nothing,” or “Probably taking a nap.” I like the challenge of thinking on my feet, which is my primary job on the new program. And I just like being busy.

Although I am not very busy, I’m busier now than I have been since before the pandemic and I’m reminded that it’s quite nice to go through one’s days with purpose. It’s even better to go through one’s days with purpose and baskets of snack foods available whenever you desire.

For some time, I’ve been feeling rather sour towards my chosen profession. Too many disappointments. Too much frustration. Too much self-doubt. One of the few wonderful things about this business, though, is that you’re always just a phone call away from changing your fortunes. I don’t necessarily mean financially, I mean creatively. We performers just want the chance to perform. For most of us, those chances don’t come along as often as we’d like. We find ourselves questioning ourselves, wondering if all the people who didn’t believe in us were correct not to do so. Last night, for the first time in a while, I felt as though I was exactly where I was meant to be.

Though I will never admit to feeling happy, I am currently less unhappy than I have been in some time. One might even say I am un-unhappy. And I shall remain so for the next six weeks, which is how long I give it until our terrific new show is canceled.

Anyway, this was just meant to be a short note of gratitude. I’m thankful for the opportunity to do a job I enjoy doing, thankful for the great people with whom I’m doing it, and especially thankful that I will soon be stealing some amazing new clothes. It’s not always easy to stop and give thanks. Not always easy to even recognize our own good fortune. Perhaps I’m only doing so now because I’ve had no sleep, or because I have a few leisurely hours before I have to report to set, or perhaps I just needed a reminder that I’ve got it pretty good. Whatever the reason, I’m experiencing gratitude and I find the best way to experience gratitude is to share it with the hope that somebody else will rediscover their own.