10 Comments

Love this, Michael. Thank you for writing it.

Think you nailed it on the celebrity thing. The reason the deaths of these strangers can feel so visceral is b/c they've 'mapped' something in our lives.

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London has changed you.

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I just read a wonderfully amusing piece that made no sense. Made me subscribe!

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My dad dug a ditch to the street to drain the horrible flooding in the back yard from living on a hill and would always seem to flood the basement. He would dig the ditch starting very deep near the back and closer and closer to the surface as he approached the street and made me take a picture of him as he was halfway in the ditch in the middle of the path up to his chest. His anniversary of his death was yesterday and after he died 6 years ago we had so much rain in Atlanta from like 5 passing hurricane remnants the ditch was overwhelmed and clogged and the basement leaked like the water under Noah’s ark the biggest flood I had ever seen. The roof leaked too. My mom fell and broke her hip that weekend from all the stress. My mom still uses a walker and is better. The roof was paid for by insurance but the basement was an utter mess. All my family friends chipped in and we got the basement back in shape but the problem remained that water was pouring out a big hole in the cinder block foundation. We called in the experts. We can build a water sink in the back yard that will drain all water into a huge quarry of rocks that will dig it deeper. We can yank out all the bushes dig a ditch and get the water to the sink hole. We can build a sub pump that will direct all water out the basement door or as the solution we went with we can use a copyrighted foundation protection using multiple techniques to capture protect and reroute water like they do on airport runways. This of course would cost the amount of a small car, but I recalled dads small 401k would cover it, but did we want to use all the money for that? I wanted a permanent fix because Im not ever going to dig a ditch like my dad because over time those solutions always fail and you are digging another ditch. And I felt my dad for the first time after he died console me to spend the money on a best solution to help my mom. He was there helping me. Yesterday I went to dinner with my friend to Mad Italian and we get along great and laughed and laughed at such stupid stuff and real stuff...epic dinner, but near the end a man sitting next to us came up up to us and asked us to please keep it down as he was trying to enjoy his dinner. I literally laughed out loud. Who was this man? So my friend and all continued to laugh quieter and then loudly say thing like, maybe next time they can sit us a as far away from people as possible...we are so loud we should be more considerate of others. We could sit on a far corner of the porch. My friend suggested rather loudly we could get a sound proof booth. Perfect I shouted! Thank God it’s not Friday Happy Hour cause I think some people might not like being told not to have a good time. And we laughed and got quiet and the man and his friend next to us got up to leave and the man who interrupted earlier said if you weren’t such a faggot and your dad had taught you how to better fight you might not have had to deal with this. And I slammed my hand on the table and all the dishes rattled and said get the hell out of here. Are you psycho? You were on the way out, so get OUT. Are you psycho, and my friend said your friend just called my friend a faggot and insulted his father who is really the psycho one and I again slammed my hand on the table and said quietly you were on your way out so get now shouting the hell out of here. And the friend said I’m not feeling safe and I slammed my fist again and said you wanna meet me in the parking lot? GET OUT. My friend Bridget was beside herself and he looked down, said sure and they walked out. I don’t think directly to their car but they left. That man had insulted my father on the anniversary of his death. Bridget said did you see them walk in I had not. I think they were just sitting there. What the hell? They left but did they ever get in a car and leave. We were sitting looking at the parking lot and never saw a car leave. Bridget asked the manager to walk us to our cars and we went home with no further incident. She called me on the phone to see if made it home and I said that man insulted my father and me on the day my father died. Bridget said that was evil. It must have been the devil incarnate and I became sad that this was how my father was supernaturally manifested to me outside of his ditch advice anyway and I prayed for him. I prayed for the two men and I prayed for Bridget and asked her to pray for the two men and she said I’ll definitely pray something for them sarcastically. And there is my multiverse. Did I meet the devil? Maybe. But I sure has hell got that crazy insane idiot out of the restaurant the Mad Italian without arguing with an idiot. My mom is 100% Italian it’s our favorite restaurant and my dad was 50% Irish...don’t be dissing my dad on his death day. Mad Italians slogan is get mad, fuggetaboutit. What just happened? I can’t seem to recall.

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Wow. That was a lot to process. All I can say is, well, I guess all I can say is wow. Glad the basement is fixed.

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When you said you don’t dig ditches in your side comment it reminded me of the good experience of my dad and his advice to help my mom. That was special so I shared this because it just happened last night and today I read your beautiful article about the inevitability of death for everyone and the multiverse and the random ditch story balanced that horrible event on my dads anniversary. Without remembering the ditch the story it was all completely weird. And the theory of a multiverse does feel real as I am an avid science enthusiast and know exactly what you mean as you delve into these theories and come out with all this theory of everything and completely overwhelming. It’s the nature of infinity and eternal...by its nature those things are overwhelming. I think it’s appropriate with Father’s Day coming up to honor our fathers and not just defend their name. My Dad was a beautiful saint who cared for and protected all his children the best way he knew how. He taught me how to fight but most of all he taught me how to love. Thank you Dad this fathers day. I love you and miss you always. Amen

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Thanks a lot, Michael. Now I’m going to go wrap my head in a damp towel to cool what you’ve just done to my brain.

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Not sure I communicated anything of merit but I think there's something in there somewhere.

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I have dug a ditch. 0/10. Do not recommend.

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Thank you for confirming my life choices.

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